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It Can Be Loney at the Top – But C-Suite Coaching Cards Can Help
Join C-Suite Coach, Kim Randall and our very own Darren Smith, as they talk about support for C-Suite (executive-level managers). Face it, sometimes it gets lonely at the top, especially when everyone is rushing to you for support. Explore Kim’s passion for delving into the human side of leaders, helping them to connect with who they are as a person as well as a leader. If you’re a leader or want to offer support, make sure to check out this podcast.
You Can Read the Full C-Suite Transcript Below:
Darren A. Smith:
Hello. You’re at a podcast. Welcome to the world’s stickiest learning. We’re with Kim Randall and also Pudding who you’re stroking there.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I am to try and get him to not join in. I think he might be the more vocal of the two of us this morning.
Darren A. Smith:
It’s probably true. That’s probably true. The title of our podcast is where Do C-Suites go to for support now? I’m joined by Kim, who is a C-Suite coach. Is that right?
Kim-Adele Randall:
It is.
Darren A. Smith:
OK, now in the nicest possible way. Kim, I’m going to ask you, why should we listen to you about this?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Great question, Darren. So I guess for me, I started off as in C-Suite and was there for a number of years. And then when I became a mum, I decided that I could have a bigger impact by coaching of the C-Suite leaders. Having been there and realised that it might be lonely at the top, but it’s certainly not quiet. Everyone is looking to you for the answer. Everyone expects you to always be on your game. People forget that our cease suite leaders are people 1st and leaders second and we are all perfectly imperfect. We have things that go wrong in our lives. We don’t always know the answer.
Darren A. Smith:
True.
Kim-Adele Randall:
We’re not always feeling like we’re firing on all cylinders and so if we can, when we understand the human side of that C-Suite, that was one of my passions as part of my purpose, which is how do we help those C-Suite leaders connect with who they are as a person as well as who they are as a leader and give them that support? Because no human being in the world can survive without support for long. And it’s this way you think the phrase comes from lonely at the top. I think so, yeah. Because when you get to the top, you both from. From my own experience and also from, you know, coaching at hundreds of other C-Suite leaders, one of the things that is so common throughout is we all fear becoming irrelevant.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And when you get to the very top, you know that everybody wants your job. You’re doing one of you, so there’s nowhere to go. So actually all you are is hanging on for dear life until somebody comes to step into those shoes and that is that plays in, in their head. It’s that, you know, am I still adding value? Am I still relevant? Am I still doing stuff? Cause where do you go for your help? You can’t. If you have those moments of doubt, we all have them. You know, in Process syndrome hits us all at some point in our life, you kind of go well, where, where, where do I go?
Darren A. Smith:
True. True again.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So I’m having this moment of doubt and I can’t go to my direct reports because they’re one looking to me for support and equally looking for any element of weakness so that they might be able to take and I can’t go to the board because they might doubt my confidence or credibility and therefore you know that might have ramifications. So where do I go in those moments? Where I need to get out of my own head and we all know that we all have blind spots for the reason we’re blind to them.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So no amount of looking at ourselves in the mirror is going to highlight those blind spots. What we need is a sometimes a sounding board, sometimes a trusted advisor, sometimes just a safe space where I don’t know if you’ve ever had these moments, Darren, where you’ve been saying something in your head for a long time. So plausible, it’s so likely to be real.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And then you say it out loud to another human being, and at that point you go. So can I don’t help you or I’ve just heard from myself how ridiculous that is But you need that space to be able to do it, cause saying it’s yourself in the mirror still sounds plausible.
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Darren A. Smith:
Alright, try very trick. When we talked to companies about training our office and talking to these C-Suite type people, then we might say to them and what about for you and they’re like, what do you mean, what about support for you though? No, no, no. Let’s do it for our people. Don’t you need something as well? No. Why is that? And I think it is that fear. They’re not sure that they want to show their underbelly. Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah, because it takes courage to show vulnerability and there is that line. It’s like you know, how do you show vulnerability without losing credibility? There’s a balance and it’s helping them find that balance and that confident balance that says, OK, this is OK because actually when we inadvertently when we say I don’t need any help myself that you all need help. We don’t have the impact we expected to have, so our impact is we’re trying to be magnanimous.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
We’re trying to say, like, you know, I’ll give it to you that because I want to be supportive.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes, yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
What instead comes across is I don’t need it, but you not do, which is the exact opposite of what our intention is, and I think for me, that’s one of the big things I talked to see sweet about which is impact versus intention. Their intention is usually really positive, but very often how they’re delivering it. They’re impact they’re having is so misaligned and that’s when you see people starting to really question whether or not the values are really there, whether or not there’s as a a disconnect, which in a world where we are constantly battling how we win, attract and retain top talent. The last thing you want is a misalignment between your intention and your impact.
Darren A. Smith:
Absolutely. I like that you and I talked about it in our prep and it’s impacts an intention. Can you give us an example that my brain that to life for us, something real life where you’ve either experienced it or seen it in someone your coaching?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah. Yes.
Darren A. Smith:
Because I really like that impact and intention. Things. Oh, I got that.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah. So I was.
Darren A. Smith:
OK.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I was doing coaching for an entire season suite for one organisation, so individual coaching it had been driven by the CEO and when I was talking to their direct reports they were like ohh if you know doctorial he can’t tell him anything. You’ve not got this, and so if you given him that feedback and there were lots of shaking heads looking surprised like no Kim and that was like, why not? Well, I don’t think I know we couldn’t do that. We couldn’t possibly do that was like, OK, but he’s instigated this program, so he’s doing it’s part of his development. He’s brought me in.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I just as well as other coaching. I do stakeholder driven coaching where you get the stakeholders, you get them to give the feedback as well. So yeah, he’s driven this to say he wants the feedback when we don’t think he really does so. And they said, well, could you give him the feedback? That’s fine.
Darren A. Smith:
Virgin volunteer.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Absolutely I can. And I will. That’s part of my job, I said. But let me play out for you. What will happen? I give him the feedback that this is how you all feel. He comes out to talk to you about that and you will go. I don’t know what she was on that day. I didn’t say that must have been somebody else as it how likely is he to really believe that this is a challenge, that he has an opportunity to overcome and they were like it’s fair point.
Kim-Adele Randall:
But could you give it him anyway? So I went into to talk to him. Right. Others giving them the feedback and he was like no, definitely not. And I said, OK, let me let me start from a different place because the first thing that we do when we’re given feedback is we defend what we were trying to achieve.
Darren A. Smith:
Could.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So he’s trying to be supportive, to be open minded to the areas that he needs to develop. I said so, so I shared this with him. I said let’s start with what I think is your intention. I think you’re trying to be an open minded leader. I think you’re trying to create a culture where need back as part of the DNA where it’s the positive because everything is about moving you forward. It’s allowing you to be the best that you can be. It’s shining that light on your blind spots to allow you to see them.
Darren A. Smith:
Nice, that’s.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And therefore respond to them, would I be correct? And it was like absolutely came one brilliant. So that’s great. That’s what you’re trying to be. That’s your intention. That is what you were putting. You think you’re putting out into the world?
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Can I now share with you the impact you’re having? Because while that’s what you’re trying to do, the impact you’re having is people are scared to come and talk to you.
They don’t think you will listen to the feedback they are afraid of making a mistake.
And that’s the culture that they are now permeating throughout the organisation.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So while you’re intention is here, your impact is here and my role is to help you align your impact, your attention.
Darren A. Smith:
Yep, no
Kim-Adele Randall:
And it was like, alright, I get it. So now, now, actually I’m on the same page now. You’re my ally. Let’s work that through. I said because there is the old adage, a fish rots from the head and said so. If we’ve got a problem in our culture, we have to look at the leader and say where, where is the misalignment between intention and impact. Because I believe that most people’s intentions are honourable, there is always before shouts at me. There is always exceptions to the rule, but I believe in the mania people don’t get up in the morning and go under.
Kim-Adele Randall:
How to be really horrible today I wonder how to be a really rubbish boss I wonder how to really frighten everybody who works for me I wonder how to stifle my organisation action being creative, innovative and forward thinking right I’ve yet to meet a cease suite leader that I think has that as their mantra in the morning. This is my intention for the day.
Darren A. Smith:
You’re right, everyone goes to work. They want to do a good job. They want to make a difference, or at least 99% of people absolutely agree. Great.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So once we know that piece one, the one of the challenges we got is when somebody starts to tell us about how we didn’t deliver what we expected, they’ve not first shared with us that they believe we were trying to do the right thing.
Darren A. Smith:
OK.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So what we defect is what we were trying to do.
Darren A. Smith:
No.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So you end up in this awkward conversation. Well, where you’re trying to tell them what they did and they’re trying to tell you what they were trying to do.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And you having different conversations, you’re not aligned and it’s very much in that emotional space. So we’re all in that emotion. We’re all in that fear when we instead start by agreeing the intention. So let me just check. I want to know if I want if I’m right, I think what you are trying to achieve. What you’re looking for, you’re big goal is this. This isn’t this. Am I right? Yeah. Great, because that’s a great goal to have. That’s awesome. I love that that’s going to have such a great impact on you organisation and your people.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Do you mind being sharing with you how some of what you’re doing isn’t helping you achieve your intention? Oh my God. Yeah, because that’s what you’ve done by sharing. The intention is you’ve gone. I think you’re a good person. I think you’re trying to do the right thing. I absolutely categorically believe in your goal. It’s the right thing to do. So now actually it’s not about criticism.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
It really is about constructive feedback because I’m no longer fearful of what you’re going to say because all you’re going to do is help me achieve my goal and so totally switches the dynamics of the fact that as we chatted in there and as we were coming into this, I remotion brain responds 24 times faster than I thinking brain. So unless we address first the emotion, what happens is it’s not. We don’t respond to what’s happening.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
We respond to what we’re making it mean and that’s why they say there’s three versions of the truth. My truth? Your truth and the actual truth, because it isn’t factually what’s happened. It’s what both of us have made it mean, and how we’ve responded to it, that that gives us our version of the truth.
Darren A. Smith:
I love that. So we talk about in intention, we’re talking about impact and that bit about I’ve just written it down, the emotional brain responds 24 times quicker than the thinking brain. I didn’t know that. OK. Fabulous. Fabulous. I love that. And you talked about the misalignment, so then it’s just about trying to get these two to do this. OK, I like that.
Kim-Adele Randall:
That’s yeah, absolutely. And the person with the problem always has the answer.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
They don’t know the answer, but they have it within them and so I guess you know as you know, in coaching our job is to really listen, really listen and that doesn’t sound very hard until you ask somebody how well they really listened because we’ve lost the art of being comfortable with silence.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
The minute I stopped speaking, you know you’ve got to start. So when you think I’m about to wrap up, you’re no longer listening to me because you thinking about what you’re going to say because we’re fearful of that moment because we don’t want the person to think we weren’t listening, whereas if we were genuinely listening, there would be a moment’s pause where we’re going. And you can feel that by showing your actively listening. And that’s really interesting. OK. What that’s made me think is and then we and it’s usually the gold comes in the moment where we’re wasting our time thinking of the response and that’s when they tell us the real gold.
Darren A. Smith:
OK.
Kim-Adele Randall:
You don’t have like key. That’s going to unlock what’s going on, and but we’re already off here and we are. We’re solving the world and this is as all human beings, not just as coaches, it’s how we manage all conversations these days.
Darren A. Smith:
And let’s talk about coaches. There is a perception that coaches can do the job better of than the person which is total, right?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah, yeah.
Darren A. Smith:
But just give me your take on that because we know it’s true. But for the people listening, what? What’s your take?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Oh, I get that all the time. So you’re a coach. You think you better? Is that absolutely not? Absolutely not. And my. I was share with people that if you think about every top actor, every top actress, every top business person, entrepreneur, politician, athlete, do you name it? They’ve all got a coach.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes, yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
If the coach were actually better, it would be their name we knew and we don’t know their name. And that’s because they’re not better at it. What they’re able to do is stand behind you and shine a light on your blind spots. And that’s why in my opinion, every coach should have a coach, not because that coach is better than them. I’ve got a number of coaches. I can’t see my blind spots.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I can’t, no matter how hard I try, but they can help me to see my blind spots and together we grow. Yeah.
Darren A. Smith:
And my example of that would be we always show a picture of you saying Bolt and Glenn Mills and Glen Mills by his own account is a short fat look. Now, Glenn, I think he can’t even run, is what he says. And there’s a lovely bit in the Netflix documentary called I Am Bolt. I think I am bolt and you say looks to the camera and he points to Glenn and he says all that bloke does is ask me questions. Love that?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah.
Darren A. Smith:
It’s like he’s a coach. What a brilliant, brilliant. Yes, yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah, because he knows that actually the answer is within you’re same bolt and it’s more a case of it’s sometimes what we need is the right question.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah. Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
You know that one of one of the greatest joys in my life is when you, when you finally frame the question, find the right question and you see the light bulb go off in the person you’re coaching and you’re like, yes, that’s the one. Because when the right, it won’t be the same one for everybody. But once you see it and you see that dawning while realisation and that and that knowledge that they knew the answer, that actually it was that they always say everything that we need is inside us what we need to do is find the key to get it out.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes. Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Because I’m sure you sometimes get those moments where I know it’s inside me, but I wish it comes. I really helpful if somebody would make everyone obvious to me right about now.
Darren A. Smith:
And it’s like the questions of the keys to unlock the doors.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Absolutely.
Darren A. Smith:
So we’re talking about where to see suite go for support. So if I were to assume that I don’t know this, but they probably break into three groups, don’t give me any sport support. That’s where I’m going to expose myself. There’s something a little bit I can do, and then there’s probably the enlightened few that grab a coach like you. Are they the three or are there more groups, more types?
Kim-Adele Randall:
No, it’s. I think they probably want one of the and that’s probably a nuance of your first one, which is don’t give me anything. I don’t need it and they’ll be there. Don’t give me anything. I don’t need it in public and then private. I know I need something really because actually this is really hard.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
This is, you know, we sadly see so much the these days and I’ve got a few clients have been in that space where it reaches burnout because they’re not reached out for help and that you internalise all of that. It’s going to come out somewhere. You know, they say that that disease is actually disease.
Kim-Adele Randall:
It’s a body that’s not at ease. And so we, we’ve got to be really careful of those parts. And therefore, I think that’s where there’s an opportunity for people to start doing some elements towards self-help. So that might be they that you know they read in, they read books, they listen to podcasts like this one, and they go and get some resources where they can go. OK, I can do. I can take the first step. I can do something today. Nobody needs to know.
Darren A. Smith:
Yep. Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
You know, it’s like share with anybody that I’ve just listened to this book or just listen this podcast or because I read my books on audible or read my book or have done this. Nobody needs now, but what I would like to show with everybody is take a step. No one has to do it alone, and if you’re not ready to take a big step, take a little one because all of it will help. All of it will allow you to view things from a different perspective, because everything in the world is a world of polarity. For every left there’s a right for every there’s a down. So for every problem there’s an answer, and sometimes we just got to have it put in a different way for us to view it from a different angle for us to see what that answer is.
Darren A. Smith:
And that first step that you’re asked him to take, what’s the objective of for the first step, if there was an objective, is it to shine that light on a blind spot or something else?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah. So I think it is. I think it’s to identify what’s getting in your way from finding the answer.
Darren A. Smith:
OK.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So when we’re in that moment when we’re in that space, he you kind of know you think sorry, you think you know what the problem is and this is very often the piece and that again there’s a theory I think it’s called the five my theory and it says that when we ask somebody a question there will first respond with the answer they think is most likely. So when you say to somebody, for example, that’s handing in their notice and you say, what is its major leaf, the pay, this is the part of the package, because we expect that people will accept that.
Kim-Adele Randall:
But when you dig into it and I’m not suggesting everyone, everyone listening to this suddenly becomes a child. That goes why, why? Why to everything? Because yeah, living with a 7-year-old, I understand the pain of that, but it’s that part that goes, oh, that’s really interesting. Can you tell me more about what is about the package that you’ve got versus the package that you’re getting that’s causing the problem? And if they were the same, would you stay? Because there’s, well, actually next that’s not the problem.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So you dig into it and the reality is, by the time you get to the kind of fifth level, you get the fact that I really hate my boss, it stops me and I don’t want to be here. And so even if you change that now, you wouldn’t be able to change the other.
Darren A. Smith:
Right, Yep.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So I guess for me the taking the first step is to be able to say am I currently addressing the actual problem or am I currently addressing a symptom of the problem? Umm, because if you’re only addressing the symptom, you cure that one, but you’re not cured the problem. So you’ll feel more and more stuck. That’s I’m running really hard and I’m getting nowhere.
Darren A. Smith:
And yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I think I’d be saying bolt and I’m not so. So I think for me the reason I ask people to do it is I know what it felt like to feel that stuck and the relief when actually I was able to find ways to view things differently, to look at them from a different angle, to go. I’m only said that was it not and you know, one of the things I would say to people is start living with a life of passionate curiosity, with yourself as much as with others. So we, we’ve still got brains that were designed the way that they needed to be when we were Cavemen, and that was making decisions.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Make it quick. I’m not going to be killed or not. It’s just safe, is it not? So we still do that today. So people tell us something, and we immediately go either agree or disagree because we leaped judgment. I now say to myself, because I still do it, because that’s where my brain swelling, but I immediately follow up with why are you so sure why you so sure that you agree? You disagree? Why haven’t you asked more questions? So then I’ll ask of the destiny said, it has really interesting. Not thought of it like that. I’d love to know a little bit more about how you got there.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah. Umm.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I may still continue to disagree, but I’m going to learn something in the process and it allows me to stop immediately holding on to that first thought and go. That’s it. And which over the years of doing like running businesses myself, but also coaching leaders through it is once you can get yourself in that space where you’re open to not having to accept that the first answer is the right one is the moments of cure breakthrough and through creativity and innovation.
Darren A. Smith:
Wow, having spoken to you a couple of times, I’ve said to you again in the nicest possible way. You are and usual and I love the way you look at things and to grab 10% of that and coach that in other people. Wow. Wow. So let me ask you a slightly different question.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Thank you. Course.
Darren A. Smith:
If I want to take a first step, I’m looking for support. I’m a see you suite, but I don’t want anyone to know a good book. Could I read what do you recommend?
Kim-Adele Randall:
Yeah. So there’s, uh, there’s a few that I really like so detailed by Brené Brown is is a really good one.
Darren A. Smith:
OK.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And I like the big leap by Gay Hendricks, and that talks about how most of the time we settle for our sphere of excellence. So we’ve worked out we’re good at something and that we can get paid for it.
Darren A. Smith:
Oh God.
Kim-Adele Randall:
But actually our sweet spot, the bit where we really are as on barocca is when we do the work to become our sphere of genius at it’s a fascinating. It’s a fascinating book for those so. So I would I would highly recommend those I I love books. I’ve got lots that I would do.
Darren A. Smith:
Umm.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Crucial conversations is another one that I’d recommend for anybody because it really helps you do the breakdown of those moments when a conversation becomes crucial and by that what they mean is it’s emotionally charged. So one or both of you is feeling fear of something and they again talk very much about stick to this intention and then you can keep coming back to it. And so they probably been my 3:00. If I were, if I were looking at good books to help you move forward this.
Darren A. Smith:
Alright, talk with this. Fabulous. Alright, just written down a couple of those thinking I’d like to look at those all right. And then as another first step, we’ve got some coaching cards that you and I have done together.
Kim-Adele Randall:
OK. Yep.
Darren A. Smith:
So you kindly wrote about 80 questions and these are C-Suite coaching cards. Would you bring that to life for us? How they can be used, that type of stuff?
Kim-Adele Randall:
‘Cause so they actually work on the grow model and the grow model has been around since then, the 1980s and it is most people have heard of it and it is A and it’s a really it’s really simple model and almost can be dismissed because it is so simple. But very often it’s the simple models that the most impactful, because as the saying says, keep it simple. And So what? What it does is it says that, you know, imagine I was trying to bring its life by saying, imagine you are in a sat NAV. You’re about to. You’re out program in the SAT NAV. What’s the first thing you have to do with your sat NAV? Tell it where you going. If you don’t tell it what you’re, it’s not going to get there.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah, no.
Kim-Adele Randall:
So the first part of grow is obviously goal. What is it you’re trying to achieve in the more clarity you get on that better it is. The second thing you do with these lab is tell it where you are, because if it doesn’t know where it knows where you go but doesn’t know where you are, it can’t calculate the options and then you’ll know it comes up with I’m calculating. Are there any things you want me to know? What to avoid this and so with grow, you’ve got your goal, then you’ve got your reality. Where am I? And then you’ve got your. What are your opportunities? What the options? What things could you do?
Darren A. Smith:
Yep.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And I always say within that also include what your obstacles, because it’s the obstacles that will get in your way. And often when we’re doing goal setting and particularly a C-Suite, we map out the happy path. So here’s where I’m going. Here’s where I am. Here’s my options. I’m going to go and do them. It’s like unless you know what your obstacles are, they going to blindside.
Darren A. Smith:
Yep.
Kim-Adele Randall:
You know them take action and then you’ve got your, you know, what are you going to do?
Darren A. Smith:
Yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
How willing are you to go into that and comfortable space and do that growth and the purpose of the cards is they’re broken down into those four steps so that and there’s a variety of them, cause back to what we were saying earlier, it’s finding the right question for the right person at the right time. So in each of the you know in each of them is broadly 20 for each segment of them. And the idea is read through them and find the one that actually goes. That’s the one for me today. That’s the one.
Kim-Adele Randall:
That has absolutely unlocked that challenge because it’s helped me see it from a different view. And I think sometimes the reason I love the grow model, it is back to that. Are we dealing with a symptom or A cause is often we think well it didn’t work because it was the option that we took and again I always get people to question through all the cards and go was it the option or was there something in your reality that you’d not really considered?
Kim-Adele Randall:
So if I were to use a personal outside of work, one I was, you know, start of locked down, I said I’m going to do couch to 5K, and I’ve got my goal. And my reality was I used to run years ago and that should probably be OK and here’s my options and it didn’t work and it didn’t work because I was locked in with a 3-year-old and I’m a single parent. So what do I think she was going to run 5K with me.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
There’s never going to happen, so I was missing a massive factor in my reality that I’d just not considered.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah, yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I thought about actually when she was at school, I could go when she was at school, but she’s not at school. She’s in locked hunt. So it’s those elements that go OK, we sometimes have to come back all the way back up the model to say actually we would just weren’t really clear on our goal. And therefore the option was never going to work and that’s why I love the model. Is it is so fluid, and particularly in these sweet it’s really useful. I use it in meetings, so I use it in meetings and go. What’s the goal of this meeting?
Kim-Adele Randall:
What do I want to get out of this next board meeting that I do a lot of board effectiveness and then what’s the reality of where we are right now so that I can understand what my options are and how we’re going to happen. But I use it also to frame it when I’m sharing meetings. OK, so the goal of the meeting today is this. The this is what we’re trying to achieve. This is what we want to do for the organisation. The reality is this is where we are. So now let’s get into our options and what are we going to do? What are we going to do next? It really helps our brain frame away through a problem.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah. Populous. Populous, alright. We’re just coming to the end, so I’m going to ask you, would you show us the coaching cards?
Kim-Adele Randall:
I have.
Darren A. Smith:
You’ve got a box there just so people can see. OK, so it looks a bit like that. Fabulous.
Kim-Adele Randall:
This is.
Darren A. Smith:
So as a first step in terms of where can I see suite gets support, it could be a book, it could be a podcast because they don’t want to expose themselves. Yet it could be using the coaching cards and then if they’re really lucky, they could be coached by you.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Bless you. Yeah. Ohh yeah me awesome. Another person I want for me. What I would always say, if you if you’re going to go and talk to a coach and work with them, it’s really important that you connect with the right person.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
You what could somebody that you go. I trust them.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I you’re going to have to share. I am your friend mobility and it takes courage to share vulnerability.
Darren A. Smith:
Yeah.
Kim-Adele Randall:
And you know which? I always have huge admiration for C-Suite leaders who have the courage to share that vulnerability, to start to take those steps because I know how hard it is to do and how, you know, it’s a gift when people give you that. So I think talk to a few find the bomb where you go out and you know, actually, I’m going to. I’m going to feel like this is a safe space. A good coach should be able to shift for you. At sea, sweet between and a non-exec.
Kim-Adele Randall:
Director to your role. So that kind of like, you know, mentor and they need to be a trusted advisor, they need to be able to be your critical best friend. And the reason I would say critical best friend is anyone can criticise. But when your best friend criticises you, they do it out of love.
Darren A. Smith:
Yes. A lot.
Kim-Adele Randall:
They do it because they have your best interest in heart and the other piece is just to be able to be a sounding board and a safe space. That kind of like, no judgment, doesn’t matter what it is. I get anything. You’re anything that’s said in the room stays in the room, kind of pieces, so that when you do share that silly thing that you’ve been saying in your head that has been holding you back for weeks, that they aren’t going to laugh at you. And they are. When you go I care for myself.
Kim-Adele Randall:
I don’t need to go on. They’re like, OK, there’s no judgment in this space. And I think once you find those people. Umm yeah, that that the for me personally we were. I’ve got coaches I’ve had coaches throughout my career and they have been the piece that has catapulted me to the next level. That’s allowed me to look at the dark parts of myself. Look at the parts where I have to be accountable. Well, myself versus being victim toward gone on externally and not have to do it alone.
Darren A. Smith:
Atlas, so the title of our podcast is lonely at the top. Where do C-suites go for help? Go for support, Kim. Thank you for answering our questions. And pudding. Who’s gone? Who’s lovely dog? That was shouting at the window cleaner is now quiet.
Kim-Adele Randall:
You know, I know. Bless him. He’s always quite at the wrong times. I do it. I do a live TV show once a week, once a month in a in America, and guaranteed he will be quite as a math the entire day.
h4>Kim-Adele Randall:
The 2nd that the cameras roll.
Kim-Adele Randall:
He’s like me, Mummy. I want to come. What? Thank you for having me.
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